Cocktails

Cocktails

Cocktails have a bit of a mixed reputation; both in life and here at Whisky Dog. On the one hand they can be delicious, impossibly cool looking to drink and have a decidedly insalubrious effect. On the other hand, they can be horrifically syrupy bile in colours Dali might have thought twice about using. Although it does still tend to have a decidedly insalubrious effect. Yes, I'm looking at you, 'Woo Woo'. The humble, or decidedly extravagant cocktail has also taken a bit of a battering at the hands TV shows like Sex and the City, with its obsession with Cosmos. After all, what is more female than a cocktail? It really doesn't help that cocktails are a good way for bars to make money and so, generally, are...underpowered, to say the least. For too long we have suffered at the hands of chain bar cocktail menus which always comprise of a half pint of ice, a single measure of cheap vodka, then a copious amount of some unknown substance from a plastic bottle below the bar – a frankly bewitching sounding combination which then costs half your day's pay and then is gone in minutes. It can't be savoured, and tastes only of E-numbers and high fructose corn syrup. Or something.

But it doesn't have to be this way!

I suppose we have Mad Men to thank for a lot of this, but a good cocktail; made with whiskey, is now within our grasp. All we have to do is reach out and take it. Or find a bar that makes it. Or, you know, learn the recipe ourselves. And, chaps, it is always whiskey. I've seen concoctions made using single malt scotch and that, well, that just seems wrong.

First; the bar that makes it: The Old Fashioned

This is THE whiskey cocktail, beloved of Don Draper and everyone else who tries it. In fact, my first taste of this cocktail was when someone shoved one into my hand in a bar with the words 'This is what Don drinks'. I hadn't seen any of Mad Men at this point so I nodded, and smiled, and then drank the single best mixed drink I'd ever tasted. On one level so simple, and yet undeniably brilliant, an Old Fashioned is basically bourbon, a drop of Angostura bitters and some brown sugar mixed with water. There are many, many, many variations of this. In fact, the bar in question, located in impossibly trendy Camden has two variations of it themselves. However, this is by far the better version:

Old Fashioned (two)
Woodford Reserve and a dash of maraschino liqueur are balanced out with a brown sugar cube, orange bitters and slowly stirred over Ty Nant mineral water ice cubes. These drinks take time and passion to create – expect to wait 5 minutes per drink.

That last part is vital. This is a cocktail which is crafted so you get layers of sweet, bitter, sour boozy, and that delicious orange twist. The bar staff must hate them, which is a sign of a good cocktail. And just look at it. 

Forget the bright colours, forget the Cosmos, forget everything you think about cocktails in bars. It just looks impossibly cool. As will you drinking it. I guarantee*. This is a drink that should single handedly make men drinking cocktails cool again, and reclaim it from the stigma of town centre Friday nights and crying girls.

Especially if you drink one in here.

Second: learn the recipe yourself: The Stonewall

While an Old Fashioned is pretty fantastic, sometimes it just doesn't hit the spot. In the same way that a generous glass of scotch just isn't going to be what you're looking for as the sun dips on a sunny day. That's where the Stonewall comes in. It's simple, it's refreshing, it's delicious, and it's not massively sweet. This is something you could mix in really big jugs and have set between friends in a garden of a summer's eve. You'd probably have to crawl back into the house afterwards, but it'd be worth it.

You'll need bourbon, cloudy apple juice, ginger ale and limes, lots of limes. Then mix a generous measure of bourbon in a glass with the apple juice at a 2:1 apple to whiskey ratio. Squeeze in some of the juice and gooey bits from a lime, stir, then top up with ginger ale. Garnish with a slice of lime and, hey, done. Then go and set the world to rights as the shadows lengthen.

Hopefully this has rescued cocktails for you. Now, I don't expect to see you drinking cocktails in your local Slug & Lettuce again. Ever, actually. But if you must, stick to the gin – even they can't mess that up.

*Guarantee not valid in any actual real-world situation.